Just drive, you idiot.

This morning the bus driver stopped on the side of the road and started walking up and down the aisle looking for something.

"Anyone see a pair of sunglasses?"
People look around and shake their heads.
He starts looking under seats and whatnot, getting more and more agitated.
"I left it on the bench [the seats resemble benches, I suppose]...They didn't just get up and walk away!"
Is he implying that someone stole his glasses?
"Did someone pick them up?! Who picked them up? I left them right here!"
Who would want someone else's sunglasses?
He starts to look at us like he's going to search our bags.
So I say something like, "If it was so damn important, why would you leave it on a seat?"
He doesn't hear me and is convinced one of us stole the sunglasses.
An Asian man shoots back, "THEY'RE ON YOUR TUMMY." Points.
Sure enough, the driver had his sunglasses clipped to his shirt at about tummy level, but hidden behind his necktie.
He is embarrassed now.
"Thank you!..." Holds the glasses up, "Really, TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS."
The Asian guy says, "Where are we going now?"
Driver, "Where do you want to go?"
Asian guy says, "The beach. I'LL DRIVE."
The driver puts sunglasses on.
What a jackass!